I think I'll never get bored of the Good Friday message every year. The content and meaning behind this special day is the same thing year in and year out but it's never the same old thing. Every year the delivery is different, every year it is new, and its like I get a fresh revelation of what this day really means every year. And I think it's just simply amazing. My God indeed never lacks in creativity.
But then again, it is precisely the same thing that's been emphasised yearly that gets me. Until now I am still in awe that Jesus who was God, came down as a man and died for me on a tree. Humanly I think it's just... crazy. But for what He did and for what He gave I am just so extremely grateful. I can't imagine how my life would be like if I didn't know Him. Sigh God thank You for saving my life: literally, figuratively, and in all ways thinkable.
Yes so in any case, I spent much of the early part of my day and the entire night with my two of my dearest people in the world! I was all "let's have a good lunch since it's Good Friday" (ha ha and ha) and my mum was like "ok let's go Ichiban" and so my younger bro and I were like OH YAY and eventually we did! Had a nice though short chit-chat over lunch haiy we have to do this more often ah, my dear family. I cannot cannot cannot cannot really cannot wait for my dad to come back (counting down to this coming Wednesday!) so we can have meals more often together!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Who cares about getting fat when I can get to dine with my family man hahaha.
Speaking of which I have yet to go back to the gym oh my goodness I've only gone jogging twice since the holidays started (siao liao) and it's been a month into the holidays already... OH and BKK's in exactly a week and that means more eating. Only God knows (and will know) what's in it for me (and my err body ha ha). I need to exercise (lol stupid pun) some control over my diet meow.
I'm not trying to act all secretive here (because that would be pretty bimbotic to me considering how readable this font actually is though it's small) but for the sake of not ruining this happy post too obviously I shall just stick to expressing some disappointments here. No scratch that; some is a huge understatement. I am extremely disappointed. And I am definitely not kidding when I said that I've never been this heartbroken. I admit I ever did doubt you but in the end I told myself 'nah it's not gonna happen' but hey look, you proved me otherwise. I never thought of this as a test but if it is, then the answer's pretty obvious now isn't it? Three incidents this week. Three. Thrice I have to experience all the negative feelings I don't ever want to have.So what do I say now? Thank you? Well maybe 'thank you' it is, because from this I'm learning some life lessons that I classify as of high importance. And if I think about it as God moulding my character then I think He is. And maybe I'm glad it happened, because I sincerely believe that "all things happen for good to those who love Him". From this I'm trusting Him more than ever and trusting others no more. And that what matters is what my God thinks of me, not what others think of me. I think it's sad that I've to learn this the hard and heartbreaking way (emotional type right here) but I'll just count this as a stepping stone to something greater. And to you, well what am I supposed to say to you? Now I can't think of you without my blood boiling and my heart breaking and practically just emo-ing. So let's just first allow Jesus to fix my heart, and then give time to do it's magic. Meanwhile, stay far far away from me lest you step on my toe and incur my wrath (ha) (no but seriously) (I mean this).
God I just wanna surrender all my feelings to you again - all of the good and all of the bad. I trust that You have better things in store for me. Cheers to brighter days ahead!! And now let's all keep calm and thank God it's Good Friday.
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